Great Observations
by mischievousmoonhunter
Summary: Being S.H.I.E.L.D.'s best new agent, Emma gets to live with the Avengers, to receive special training. Also, she should find her "specialty". Strugglign with this tasks, she finds she isn't the only one doubting herself; Bruce Banner is also in conflict with himself. Emma then tries to bond with him, to make him more at ease with himself.


The thing with the Avengers, is that they might not try to be intimidating and unwelcome, but they are such a tight and compact team, it just naturally happens. Besides, they are legends, some not even human. No one can stand in the same room as them, and not be a tiny bit nervous.  
As a result, I pressed my back against the wall, while it felt like High School all over again; at first I had been the "oldest", the best. But after leaving middle school (or S.H.I.E.L.D.'s basic training in my case) you get stranded somewhere where you are nothing and a nobody. besides, I was hyper aware how greatly my instructor had exaggerated my skills in my progress file.  
'So, this is S.H.I.E.L.D.'s best agent?' Tony Stark had apparently taken interest in me, after I had stood there for at least twenty minutes, since my "tour" of the Tower had been completed.  
'Agent in trainer, sir,' I corrected him.  
Stark rose his eyebrows. 'Really?' a little smirk appeared on his face. 'So, how's that, training with S.H.I.E.L.D.?'  
'It is fine, Sir. Though I am really looking forward to training with the Avengers, Sir.'  
'Uhu… your rapport says you're a clever one.' There was a challenge in his gaze, and I understood he was testing me.  
So I gave him a sweet smile, and said, 'I'm sure it's nothing compared to you, Mister Stark.'  
Stark laughed, and padded me on the back, 'you've got potential, girl. I like you.' And he walked away, leaving me relieved, with a rapidly beating heart.

Later that day, I was sitting in the living room, reading a book, trying to become comfortable with my surroundings. But there were 40 words spinning around in my mind, just as they had done for weeks now.

You can't just do everything, Williams, that's not how a team works. You need to know what you do best, so you can concentrate on that. You'll have your own part, and the team needs to know you'll do it.

I was startled when someone came into the kitchen.  
'O, sorry. I didn't think someone would be here.' It was Dr Banner. Immediately I felt nervous again; from all of the Avengers, I looked up to Dr Banner the most, since I had read most of his work, and admired it, before I became interested in "the other guy"- which had only been a requirement for my training.  
'It's okay, you just startled me a bit,' I assured him. He smiled kindly, and stopped.  
'You're the new kid, right?' he asked. 'You're going to train here, won't you?'  
I smiled. 'Yes! And I'm really looking forward to it.'  
'Great.' He walked a bit further into the kitchen, and stopped by the kettle. He faced me again. 'Do you want some tea?' he asked, gesturing at the appliance.  
'Yes, please.' Banner's kind behaviour immediately calmed my nerves.  
When it was time to pick the flavour, I quickly jumped up. 'Chamomile!'  
'I'm sorry, what?' incredibly confused he looked back at me.  
Immediately, I blushed, and looked down at my hands.  
'Chamomile,' I said quietly, 'it helps when you've got a headache.'  
'O, tha-' he stopped, mid-sentence. I looked up. 'How did you know I've got a headache?'  
'You were rubbing your temples a lot, this afternoon, when you think they can't see it. and you wince at loud noises,' I said, a bit awkwardly, knowing it sounded creepy. 'Don't worry,' I blurted out, 'I wasn't, I don't know, stalking you, or something! I also noticed that Mr Stark was having a hangover, even though he didn't want to show it, and Agent Romanoff didn't sleep tonight, and-'  
'It's okay,' Banner raised his hand, and smiled, 'it's okay to be observant. You were standing on a rather good position to see us all. Really, it's okay.'  
'Really?' Suddenly I laughed at myself. 'Please forget about that. It's my first day, and I'm trying to figure out who to be, but you know, you're all so different, I can't decide.'  
Banner frowned. 'What do you mean? Why do you have to be someone?'  
'Well, you know,' I said, gesturing a bit awkwardly, 'to make sure I fit in. Like with Mister Stark, he likes wit, but Mister Rogers values respect. Agent Romanoff appreciates a strong personality, while Agent Barton values loyalty the most. It's hard to choose an attitude.'  
Banner seemed impressed.  
Suddenly, something clicked inside the mechanism of the kettle, and a little light went on. Banner took two cups, and after placed a teabag in both of them, he handed one of them to me.  
'What about me?' he asked, while sitting down. 'What do I like?'  
I smiled thoughtfully. 'I find you more difficult. At first I thought it was intelligence, as you seem to be good friends with Mister Stark, but I don't think that's what you find most important.'  
'A good guess, but it's indeed not the right answer. Should I tell you?'  
'No,' I said quickly, 'I'd like to find out myself, if that's okay.'  
'Sure,' he smiled again, but I could see the weariness behind it. though I didn't dare to mention it; I had been here for less than a day, it would be out of place. He quickly drank his tea, before he got up. 'I'll go back now,' he said, still trying really hard to look cheerful, 'thanks for the tip.' He rose his cup, and I nodded.  
'You're welcome.'

Covered in sweat and tired from a hard training session with Agent Romanoff, I sat in what had become my favourite chair in the living room. I tried really hard not to feel to down about the training, because even though I hadn't won, I had hold my own against her for quite a long time, which is quite the achievement. Yet, I hadn't shone in any particular part of my training, like Barton had told me I had a good shot, but I wasn't sniper material, there was no place I felt like it was really mine.  
It also didn't help that there was a certain tension within the team, which they didn't tell me about, though it was obvious to me it had something to do with Dr Banner.  
From all of the team, he was probably the one kindest and most welcoming to me, while he also tried to hide his weariness the most. Which was, of course, a noble decision, but it made me feel bad for him, so I tried to be as kind as possible to him. Though this mostly consisted of me getting him cups of chamomile tea.

The next morning, I woke up like always, but when I was making breakfast – while mentally preparing myself for another shooting lesson from Barton – Banner walked into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes and looking absolutely rubbish.  
'Good morning,' I said brightly.  
'Good morning,' was his answer, not quite as energetic as my greeting. 'O, hey, uhm, I'm not sure if anyone told you… but the others are out on a mission, so… you're training has been postponed.'  
'Really? O, well, thanks for telling me. I didn't know.' I was a bit confused; there hadn't been a mission important enough for everyone to go, so I had never had a day off. What should I do?  
Then I saw Banner's eyes, and I instinctively knew there was something wrong.  
'Are you okay?' I asked hesitantly.  
Banner seemed startled, as if he had been in deep thought.  
'Uhm, yes, sure. Yes, I'm fine. What are you going to do today?' he quickly dodged the question, and moved on to another subject.  
I shrugged. 'I actually don't know. I'm not used to days off.'  
'You could always, you know, come take a look in the laboratory. If you want to. I don't think anyone showed you that?'  
'Really?' I asked, exited. 'I would love that!'

And so I followed Banner to the laboratory, and walked about the room as he worked on whatever project he was working on. My eyes couldn't decide what to focus on, and all the information made me a bit dizzy.  
'I really enjoy your work, Dr Banner,' I said a bit shyly, while I was studying a large computer screen with many letters and numbers.  
'Really?' Banner looked up, 'you've read my work?'  
'Some of it, yeah. Of course I didn't understand all of it, but I enjoy your writing a lot.'  
'I'm happy to hear that. Thank you.'  
'You're welcome.'

After a while, in which I did a lot of thinking, I spoke again.  
'If I might ask you, Dr Banner… why didn't they bring you on this mission? It seems quite important if they bring the entire team, so why did they leave you here?'  
It was bold to ask this question, I knew. I only hoped Banner wouldn't be mad, even if he decided not to answer the question.  
'I thought it best. I didn't think I'd… fit in with this mission.'  
'O.' the gears in my head spun uncontrollably. 'I thought it had to do with the fact you're doubting yourself.'  
Oops. I hadn't wanted to say that. it just came out the moment my brains realised this.  
Banner sighed deeply, and put down the things he had been holding in his hands.  
'It's that, too. You've got great observation.'  
'Thank you.' I came a bit closer, and sat down on the opposite side of the table he sat by. 'But why? You've been doing great work for a long time! Why would you stop now?'  
Again a deep sigh. He ran his fingers through his unruly hair, and frowned.  
'You know what it is, Emma,' he hesitated, 'can I call you Emma? Agent Williams sounds so impersonal for someone who you live with.'  
I nodded, and smiled. 'Sure.'  
'Well, Emma, it's this: lately I feel like I'm losing control. I don't know what it is, I'm just afraid that if I change again, I'll never change back.'  
'Was there an accident?'  
He seemed confused. '…No…'  
'Then why are you suddenly afraid?'  
He shook his head. 'I don't- I think the fear has always been there.'  
'I understand that, of course the fear is there, because people expect a lot from you. But why are you suddenly too afraid to do something you stand for?'  
Banner pressed his fingers against his temples. 'Now you sound like Tony; he thinks that the more I become "him", the easier it gets.'  
'It doesn't?'  
He shrugged. 'I don't feel the urge to test it out. Not really. However, I also know, that another reason for them to want me to go with them, is that they are afraid I'll lose control when I'm alone in the Tower.'  
'And it bugs you they think that?'  
His eyes widened slightly. 'O, no, I can't blame them. It's just that I wish they'd just said it as part of their reasoning.'  
I breathed out. 'O, so that's it!'  
Banner picked up a pen from the table, and played with it. 'What's what?'  
I grinned triumphantly. 'The thing you value, honesty. That's it, isn't it?'  
Some of the anxiety vanished from his eyes while he nodded. 'Indeed, it is.' He looked down, and I watched as he spun the pen around between his fingers.  
'Why is it exactly, that they send you here?' he looked up apologetically. 'I'm sorry, I didn't read your file.'  
'That's okay, better even,' I brushed aside his apology, 'there is a lot of nonsense in it, actually. Though it is right about why I'm here; I have to figure out what I excel at. You know, what my specialty is.'  
'How's that coming along?'  
Now it was me who sighed. 'Not that good, actually. I have absolutely no idea.'  
'I'm sorry to hear that, I hope you'll find it.'  
'Thank you.'  
Silence returned, and I started wondering the lab again. Eventually some light flickered and some speakers beeped, and Banner rose from his work.  
'That's the Team,' he translated the beeping. 'Let's go back to the living room.'  
'Sure,' I nodded, but just before I stepped outside, I turned around.  
'I think the fear came first,' I said quickly, expressing what I had been thinking about while I explored the laboratory, 'the fear made you insecure and anxious, which made your feelings unstable, which made you feel like you are losing control. At least, that's what I think.'  
Banner seemed surprised, though luckily not offended by my unrequested council. He pressed his lips together, and studied my face, almost thinking audibly.  
'That sounds… logically,' he nodded, and even more of the long seen tension dropped from his shoulders. Not all of it, naturally, that would have been strange, but a lot of it. 'Thank you,' he said, genuinely grateful, 'I think I really needed someone to make me see sense. I've let myself be led by my emotions. Thank you.'  
I dipped my head. 'You're welcome.'

While walking toward the living room, we could see the Team land outside, and near the doors. I glanced up, assessing if I should open myself up or not. I decided that Dr Banner had opened up to me, so I could do the same.  
'I think, that by knowing the group's dynamics, and studying who they are looking at, you can tell a lot about if they're injured or not.'  
'Really?' Banner's eyes shot between me and the approaching team. 'Like how?'  
'Well,' I smiled, and concentrated on the people before me, 'take agent Romanoff for example. Agent Barton is looking at her a lot, but the others aren't, so she has been hit, but not too badly. Probably in the arm, and it is badly bruised at the most. Barton himself is flinching with every other step, so his right leg must've been hurt. Agent Romanoff doesn't support him, which again tells us it isn't too bad.  
Then take Stark. He seems fine, only a bit shaken, perhaps, yet Rogers is glaring at him disapprovingly, which suggests he has taken too many risks, which almost got him badly injured.  
Rogers himself looks fine, but Stark gives him incredulous looks, which, I guess, mean he did something which should have gotten him injured, but it didn't.'  
Then the Team was close enough to talk to us, and Banner inquired after their mission. They started elaborating, and every time a detail matched my predictions, Banner's awe grew.  
Eventually he came back to me, and said quietly, 'that was some incredible deduction work, Miss Holmes.' I blushed and grinned. 'But why,' he continued, 'do you think you don't have a specialty? Your understanding of people and your power of observation is remarkable. I think you should ask if you can train that further, alongside your other training, if necessary.'  
'Really?' proudly I looked up to him, and he nodded. 'Thank you, Dr Banner.'  
A happy smile spread across his face. 'You're welcome. And please, call me Bruce.'


End file.
